Friday, October 10, 2008

Do you like puppies?

How about wolf puppies? Y'like them?

Do you know Sarah Palin took a hit out on 14 wolf puppies?

I bet she also hates sunshine, rainbows, and all babies that don't have Down Syndrome.



That video is comically intense, but true.

Picking Palin as VP starts to feel more and more like a personal attack on my personal values. Personally.

I'm a feminist --> she is anti-abortion and charges for rape kits.

I'm pro-gay marriage and was in my high school's Gay-Straight Alliance chapter --> she "tolerates" them and tries to pray them straight.

I'm a grammar-lover --> she destroys sentence structure at random AND HAS SAID THE WORD "ALSO" MORE TIMES IN THE LAST MONTH THAN ANYONE OUGHT TO SAY "ALSO" IN THEIR ENTIRE LIVES.

When I was nine years old, I adopted a wolf and was obsessed with wolves' rights --> she likes to shoot baby wolves.

When I was in elementary school, I dressed up like Martin Luther King, Jr. and wrote papers on civil rights --> she likes aggregating McCain followers who are full of a murderous rage toward a black man running for President.

I hope that I, bizarrely, find some YouTube video of her making a stump speech in the next couple of days in which she denounces women who do comedy, people with titanium rods in their back, and brunette ladies who wear glasses. And then I hope she punches herself in the face.

Please, please, please donate if you're able: My.BarackObama.com.

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