Where it formerly read
"death-smelling jizz of Beelzebub"
it now reads
"death-smelling ejaculate of Beelzebub."
Because I realized I'm classier than that.
In other news, today I informed a customer at work that she was being passive aggressive. So she asked to speak to my co-worker, Michelle, presumably to complain about my straight-talk. Joke's on her though, because I've been working there four months longer than Michelle and she has no power over me. I've also been working there three months longer than the new owners and they can't afford to lose me. So joke's on her because I'm essentially immortal and cannot be killed by ordinary means. She would have to complain using silver bullets to get me fired. And I would just like to see her try, since that doesn't even make any sense. Guffaw!